A Letter To My One Year Old Son

Hello Rory,

One year ago today — your mother gave birth to you, and in that moment my life was changed forever.

I did not realise what responsibility was before you came along. But as soon as I saw you laying on that hospital bed, that my whole body was overtook by a sense of protection and love that I had never experienced before.

Now I am not saying this first year has been easy — in fact it has been pretty tough. You haven’t slept through a whole night yet (but you have constant energy) and I have had to go part time in my job to help your mum around the house and to make sure she gets enough rest. But apart from how tough it has been, it has been without a doubt the best year of my life — its the year I learned who I am through you.

For the first couple of months, I was not really sure how to parent. Parenting IS part instinct, but a lot of it is learning. Your mother is obviously great with children, as it is her job — so I always felt as if I was not pulling my weight enough. But it came to me in time. And I definitely think — now — that I am a fantastic parent.

Now onto my first subject:-

Sleep

You have always been trouble to get to sleep. Your mother would feed you, and if you slept then you would be awake in a couple of hours. So my main job in the nights was to get you back to sleep. There have been many methods as you have grown. The first one — when you were in the first couple of months, was to hold you under your arm pits and basically lift you up and down as if I was curling weights. This would only take a couple of minutes and you would be back to sleep. My other method at this time was to put you in your car seat, play car engine noises through a bluetooth speaker I had installed in the back of it, and rock you back and fore on my lap.

Once you had got past this method, I found my absolute favourite way to get you to sleep — “The Bon Iver Disco”. I would take you into your room, the only light being a small flashing disco ball that would cast a pattern on the wall, and I would play either of the first two Bon Iver albums. I would then hold you in my arms and rock you back and fore until you slept. This would sometimes take absolutely hours — but it would always work.

Now the only way I can get you to sleep is to sit you next to me while we watch In The Night Garden episodes over and over. You show your strength through how hard you fight sleep. I like to think its because you don’t want to miss out on anything, but I promise you — the only thing that happens when you sleep….is your mum and myself going to sleep.

Swimming

When you were just 3 months old, your mum and I took you to your first swimming lesson. At first I thought it was just something to keep your mum happy, but with every lesson you have improved. You currently will happily dive into your mums arms in the pool, hold on to the railing by yourself, and also swim under water! Its been an honour to watch you learn these skills, you make me very proud (especially because I can’t swim very well at all!)

Development

Over the last 3–4 months you have started to find who you are. Not only are you walking, but you are running, crouching and stopping without falling. The first time you had the opportunity to climb the stairs, you were at the top within a minute. You are so smart — and very ahead of where the charts say you should be (we have a list of things you should be doing at 2 years old that you are already doing confidently!)

You can say Mama, Dada, Duck and Dog. And lets not forget the constant “Hiyayayaya”.

But the most important thing in your life right now are the god damn rubber ducks. Every bird you see “Duck!” This place is turning into a duck sanctuary with the amount of rubber ducks you got for your birthday.

Family

I can definitely say you are a very loved little man. All your aunties, cousins and grand parents absolutely adore you (and I can’t blame them). You are yet to meet your Aunty Katie as she has been living in New Zealand the last year. But she is home next week and is very excited to meet you.

Future

Over the next year — this is what we are going to do. Firstly, its your mum and dads wedding, so you need to look fantastic in the suit and lets hope the day goes without many hitches! Secondly, we need to work on your love of wrestling — at first you were a big wrestling fan (probably because of the fast movement and colours) but this has been forgotten and replaced by In The Night Garden, Paw Patrol and Super Simple Songs. Thirdly, your speech has been coming on so well lately, so I think that is what we are going to see a lot more of by your next birthday. I cant wait to have conversations with you, and be able to teach you things. Finally, Sleep! Thats right. I want to make sure by when you turn TWO that you have at least had one full nights sleep.

You are a fantastic, cheeky, intelligent little star. You are beyond handsome. I love you with every fibre of my being.

Thank you for helping me find who I am.

Until next time kiddo,

Dad.

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